Gorman On Gore EP14 Tetsuo The Iron Man (1989)

We go deep diving in artistic Japanese cyber splatter core body horror madness. Who is going to stop us? You? I don't think so! 

Join us as we discuss this short, intense, influential Japanese cult horror film, Tetsuo: The Iron Man! A metal-controlling maniac is out for revenge against a business man, and that is the extent of the story! We go into the grueling filming schedule, the terrible psychological toll it had on the cast and crew, causing most to totally abandon the project long before it was eventually finished. Marvel as we tell you of the tin foil and tv parts used to create the artistic madness of Tetsuo. Then we make fun of Bram Stoker's literary influence for a while, just because.

Did you ever want to see what Magneto would do if he was a weird Japanese guy who lived in a junkyard? Now you can!

Trailer for next month's episode at 1:23:10

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Transcript

0:33

hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of gorman on gore a horror film podcast

0:40

i'm your host peter gorman with me is my co-host jacob say hello jacob

0:47

hello jacob

0:53

hey what you freaked me out for a second man oh no

0:58

what what oh wait wait you can't hear me okay anyway all right yeah for a second there

1:04

i couldn't okay you know what podcast canceled all right

1:10

yeah okay i will say i i will say this about the intro but the way we're doing it

1:17

i mean we don't have to go into the technical details yes that whole time i'm just sitting there completely

1:22

motionless afraid to move so that whatever sound i make doesn't interrupt

1:27

the theme oh it doesn't matter i mean eventually we'll be able to talk over and say i mean you know i like it like the first

1:33

few times people can just listen to it but you know we can just barge in on it if we feel like it so you know for

1:38

everyone else who doesn't know i got a surprise guess what i did with my stimulus check

1:44

uh i wasted it on a mixing board so i'll be able to play live stuff which

1:50

hopefully won't change things too much i mean only for the better let's just put it that way because i want to be able to like you

1:56

know be able to comment on stuff in real time i think that's really fun for both us and for the audience

2:02

and plus i just get more shiny buttons you know to play with so there's that yeah

2:09

it's overall going to be a an ad benefit yeah i'd like to think so

2:14

so for those of you new to the podcast we take turns choosing films from the

2:20

horror genre we take notes we pick apart every scene we spoil everything

2:27

on today's episode jacob chose what we both had to watch so i'll give him the honor of announcing it

2:34

what'd we do today jacob uh peter we both individually

2:40

watched the movie tetsuo the iron man so uh just right off the bat

2:48

yeah i hope you will because i won't well okay no actually there's some really interesting stuff about it actually it

2:54

is a very exciting film i'm glad i watched it i'm not glad when i was watching it does that make

3:00

sense [Laughter] no you know that's that's completely understandable

3:07

so in japanese is it just tetsuo is does that mean the iron man or is that the

3:13

man's name as i understand it tetsuo would just mean

3:20

iron man okay yeah i don't know i don't actually speak that that hdr

3:25

i think they just put the subtitle there because you know speak japanese the movie title is a

3:31

little oh yeah you know what it is just tetsuo and in japanese but yeah

3:36

yeah that's mean it's meaningless though in in english so i assume they added

3:42

that for the oh yeah iron

3:58

yeah so i went through like half of the film it was black and white well it still is it continues to be

4:04

it's a 1989 film it's only an hour long and i went through at least half of the film just thinking like okay well

4:10

someone named tetsuo is going to show up and yeah they never do no and so i gave embarrassing names to

4:17

everybody i was just like ah businessman uh metal collector and then i i went and checked out you

4:24

know the the cast credits afterwards and it's almost the same thing you aren't off

4:30

yeah yeah that's right salary man and metal fetishist

4:37

which is a uh a great credit yes i mean absolutely if you're gonna be in a movie you might as

4:43

well be the metal fetishist yeah

4:49

okay so this will be the first time that i can do it in real time so we're just gonna listen to the trailer and uh we're

4:55

gonna talk over it because uh it's not in english and it doesn't make sense

5:00

and almost nothing happens in it on the auditory spectrum let's just put it that way but you know if nothing else you can

5:06

hear the the music play a bit

5:14

i just had to fade up [Music]

5:29

[Music] so uh

5:34

from brenda to the audience what [Music]

5:41

yeah imagine tinfoil and a lot of streaming asian men

5:50

oh i love this song by the way i mean it's got some some pretty sick

5:56

beats in this movie yeah yeah

6:01

[Music]

6:16

i should have turned on the visual part of the trailer i have no idea what's happening at this point

6:26

[Music]

6:41

that's the director by the way [Music]

6:52

oh yeah here's the best vlog yeah yeah

7:01

[Music]

7:15

huh

7:22

[Music]

7:40

okay that's probably good

7:46

so yeah [Music] it's you know it's i was about to say it's a beautiful

7:51

movie wait can you say that it's um it's an enthralling movie i'll put it

7:56

that way yeah no i mean i like i think when you take into context the

8:03

fact that it's a uh an indie movie only the effects and look

8:08

of the movie is uh pretty impressive yeah to better explain this is a 1989

8:13

film it was made in black and white by what four people i mean i think it

8:19

started with a much bigger crew and then they all fled the scene over time

8:24

they all gave up one by one yeah and it was based off of a man who made some

8:31

little artistic well i was going to say trailers but no they're like little movies i like the title of his previous 18-minute film

8:38

i think it's called a phantom of regular size something like that yeah he's got some good ones i mean i'm

8:45

just thinking that's just a great name for a phantom it's just like it's not a big phantom he's just a regular sized phantom

8:52

yeah and then you know they gave him the adventures of electric rod boy

8:57

yeah i can only imagine yeah you are going to have to explain

9:03

yourself a little bit okay so what made you think this is a good movie to choose for the audience in general

9:08

what was that what was the wider impact of this movie well first of all

9:14

i wouldn't do a movie that had a lot of like firsts for the podcast yeah you know hey first

9:21

non-western uh movie we've done i believe yeah

9:27

that's true i think so yeah yeah first black and white movie yes first movie to uh

9:35

i mean yeah i guess this would be like i'm trying to think we haven't really done any like indie movies either so this is no i don't know it really yeah i

9:42

felt like there was a lot of firsts so yeah yeah i remember having like

9:49

pretty positive opinions of the movie i mean it is to be clear complete madness yes and

9:55

also for those who haven't seen the movie you do need a bit of a trigger warning for a couple

10:00

different things it's pretty intense that's true and if you're not prepared for it it

10:06

will annihilate you yeah i for

10:12

so peter now you've seen the movie i saw this movie when it was like 13 wow really i just saw this yesterday and i i

10:19

i feel a little traumatized to be honest i yeah i

10:25

i rented it at the library of all places oh yeah right yeah i'm just thinking how

10:31

weird it is that libraries always had stuff like that it's just like people should see this you know like people

10:36

would hide stuff there this is this is this is important

10:42

that lady has an extendable penis we need everyone to see this

10:48

i'm sorry i don't want to give that away you know yeah yeah i was going to say there are a couple of other firsts in this movie oh

10:55

oh boy are there yeah for us yeah oh yeah

11:01

so we'll get to it but okay listen if you're not into grindingly relentlessly

11:07

just like harsh independent black and white movies you know with lots of screaming and bizarre

11:14

dutch angles and uh fringy elements you know like this one might not be for you

11:20

but i think yeah yeah don't don't let the kids if you can soldier through it yourself you know as an

11:26

explorer i think it is very rewarding afterwards it's like going through a trial by five

11:32

yeah yeah well speaking of trial by fire or like

11:39

a journey peter this is also the first of three movies yeah

11:44

yeah what was the next one the uh the body hammer yes and then there was tetsuo the bullet

11:52

something what was it the bolt man the bullet yeah which i think is like the most

11:58

accessible of the three that one just kind of feels like its own thing

12:03

i would have thought like this director um would have just given up after this movie i heard that

12:09

he was so frustrated while he was filming it that he almost burned the negatives yes yeah but no he went on to do

12:17

a lot of other stuff and he's even starred in a few movies like uh he was in shin

12:22

godzilla yeah i don't remember oh he was in that yeah i actually really like shin godzilla i mean it's a godzilla movie

12:30

but really it's just a way for the director to make fun of the japanese government's inability to deal with

12:35

problems the yeah i uh i appreciate that the movie

12:42

devoted so much time to uh people filing in and out of rooms to set up committees

12:48

yeah we need more it committees me of those old 1950s b movies you know where a bunch of like

12:55

old fat white guys would sit around the room and you know with pipes and we'd be like how do we deal with this

13:02

yeah except like in those movies they would usually come up with some

13:07

magnetic ray or something to kill the monster unless they're like i don't know

13:13

just send in the us government stealth bomber i guess that'll work

13:19

yeah i mean i guess that feels more realistic i mean it's absolutely realistic

13:24

i think a lot of people would be like i don't know just just send in the us they like to bomb stuff

13:29

yeah yeah but uh about okay we're talking about

13:36

the iron man yeah directed by shinya sukamoto

13:41

i believe i'm saying it correctly right okay

13:46

i mean i don't want to give it away but i looked into the production of this movie a little bit it took them

13:52

a year and a half to film this movie oh yeah a year and a half

13:59

okay most movies let's put this in context most movies will film for i don't know maybe two or three months

14:06

if it gets a little longer than that you know maybe half a year most professional actors consider that to be

14:11

horrible you know like like a like a horrible slog and then these guys yeah with shinya's

14:18

asukamoto's work money that he just saved up he just i guess whenever he was able to afford

14:23

it he just cranked out a scene you know and it just it took a year and a half

14:29

i just it's just it sounds like a hellish sweat dungeon of an apartment you know where he was just doing all

14:34

this filming well like the thing that's interesting about that is that

14:40

it does feel like so much went wrong with this but when i watched this movie

14:46

yeah i feel like this is exactly what he wanted

14:51

it doesn't feel like yeah i mean it doesn't feel like there was like any like i mean obviously they

14:57

were like budgetary compromises but like as far as like yes his vision for what this was

15:04

it completely succeeds in doing that yeah i will say that

15:10

yeah which i have to admire i mean that's that's i i think maybe it would be more fair to say that i i

15:17

didn't like this movie but i i feel like i admire it more younger man it's like tommy was so

15:24

or the tommy was so like production where everything's wrong and there's not enough money and everything fell apart

15:30

as it was being made but it became yeah what it intended to be you know tommy wassel's

15:36

movie is a frankenstein monster you know it's it's a travesty but this is actually a success it tried to be a

15:43

thing and it is that thing and it's unique yeah yeah i mean

15:48

yeah absolutely i think not to rail too hard on poor tony by so but i

15:54

think this guy strikes me as a pretty competent director i haven't seen

15:59

i mean i've seen the other tetsuo movies but oh i don't get the impression that he is as

16:06

weirdly delusional as tommy wiseau is yeah so i think that's part of the part of

16:12

the the key difference is you know just having a level head right yeah we'll get into it

16:20

but first just generally speaking would you recommend this movie to others to the general audience

16:27

to the general audience no uh no that's i wouldn't say that but uh

16:33

there are specific people i mean i feel like if you're

16:38

just generally interested in the idea of indie films i think even that can

16:44

i would even go as far as to say that you could get something out of it

16:49

even if you're not really into what it's about i think it's it's worth seeing just to see it

16:55

yeah yeah so in my in my it has a vision and uh

17:01

yeah in my own notes i wrote just in parentheses decide my own opinion later

17:07

so i think i think if you're the kind of person who would

17:13

watch the cabinet of dr caligari or carnival of souls you know like

17:19

black and white groundbreaking films that aren't terribly exciting but are very interesting for artistic or

17:25

aesthetic or just groundbreaking reasons this is perfectly for you and tetsuo is actually more interesting than

17:32

any of those films but i don't know if i'll go with the wider audience so maybe like a soft

17:38

recommendation yeah like if you're into it you know or if you think you'll be into it

17:43

yeah i feel like if you know someone well enough you know

17:48

if they're going to like it or not yeah don't spring this on people

17:53

don't do that no i don't even think it's not even like it's not even like

18:00

house the japanese film how can you just surprise someone with that and it's like

18:06

you'll get a good reaction out of that and they'll probably still find it entertaining that's not

18:12

that's not how this movie's work works listen yeah that's good instructions like surprise people with hausu don't

18:19

surprise people with tetsuo yes

18:25

bad idea don't do it folks we'll show you why

18:30

you'll see this is like if you're the kind of guy who would you

18:36

know go open hellraiser puzzle box like that's that's who you want for this yeah i think that's fair

18:44

all right so let's get into it time to sink our teeth into this weird black and white japanese cyber punky

18:52

horror film so i was gonna say it's our first saber buck film yeah i

18:58

guess technically it is i mean i'm not sure if i would call it that but i guess it is i don't know compared to anything

19:05

else you know uh sure i mean you know we'll get into like the specifics but

19:11

but it's not exactly technology working it's more i don't know what it is spirit or something i don't know

19:17

yeah then it's not an element okay so a lot of my notes for this movie

19:23

and just descriptions of scenes they're just going to be really bizarre first sentences because everything in this

19:28

film is kind of a fever dream so it's hard to describe and and it's

19:34

hard to digest especially when you're watching it for the first time yeah

19:40

so for the first scene i just wrote shaky cam footage i think it's a 16 millimeter camera you

19:45

know it's black and white ruinous warehouse man in cap a weird man gathers metal bits in his

19:52

apartment camera pans over his insane pile of metal scraps

19:57

i mean i don't know i i i just that's a good summary of what happens in

20:02

that scene yeah i mean okay so this is a short movie so i don't know this may or may not end up being a short podcast

20:09

where we describe it because it's all very basic and very strange so i mean you could actually summarize this very

20:14

quickly if you wanted to yeah yeah long story short there's a weirdo who's

20:20

collecting stuff in his apartment or a warehouse or someplace he's got a piece of rebar like a like a

20:26

rivet or something and he just cuts open his leg very graphically and you just watch him do it

20:32

and it's it's actually really great i mean for for an independent film it's really well

20:37

done yeah yeah i don't mean to say that cutting open your leg is great no no no but but

20:44

it looks great and then you watch him just insert it just for too long it's like a giallo

20:49

film or something you know just one any of those italian things that's actually perfect

20:55

that's a perfect way to describe it yeah because it's like you've seen any of those there's there's always that thing

21:01

where they linger too long on on a horrible scene you know and it's just to the point of just driving people crazy

21:07

yeah that's the thing because you watch it and like i mean good lord

21:13

you see like the blood and it's like you get it and just keeps going

21:20

yeah i mean you don't need to see him put the full rivet in his leg but you see him put the full rivet in

21:26

his leg yeah oh i even just thinking about it i

21:31

was like yeah he dresses the wound

21:37

and i think there's an intervening scene but i mean shortly thereafter he finds maggots in the wound and just freaks out

21:44

and i guess he just runs into the street because he's upset at the world or himself or maybe the

21:50

wound i'm not sure but he gets hit by a car um i guess

21:55

yeah i i mean that's the other thing i'm going to have a lot of question marks as i describe this

22:02

yeah although these nice shot when they uh zoom in on the uh

22:07

on cars like grilling out they're like they play that music yeah it's like sassy saxophone and they just like play

22:14

over yeah the grill like almost lovingly like yeah this car is just running this

22:19

guy over let's just savor this moment guys

22:28

yeah i like it i don't i'm not sure what you're meant to feel about that but it's not i like it

22:36

i do think that's something that you can you could kind of say about what was smoking

22:42

well it's saying it's saying something but i'm not sure what it is exactly yeah well the first half of the movie i had a

22:48

very strong feeling for what the movie was supposed to be about but then that ends up not being true at

22:54

all i mean we'll get into it but yeah yeah so the next scene is just

23:00

they just cut to a businessman you know japanese businessman in a nice little suit and he's just raving out in a

23:06

warehouse to a sick beat you know we already played it in the trailer and i just wrote awesome

23:12

and then it just cuts to the title card the nice tilted camera angle as they uh

23:18

zoom in on his face as the light and goes off hits and goes off yeah

23:25

the camera doesn't always decide to stay on its target sometimes it just kind of drifts around a bit

23:30

yeah i mean that's fine well it's kind of groundbreaking i don't think they really did shaky cam back then i mean i think

23:36

shinya tsukimoto did it because he couldn't afford to do it any other way but it looks good

23:43

yeah i actually yeah that's true i wonder what would be the first real example of shaking him maybe i should

23:50

look that up and been a better podcaster yeah

23:57

so that'd be sad it goes to the title card tetsuo the iron man and then uh just cuts to a scene of the

24:04

same businessman i mean you haven't seen him before other than when he was dancing but now he's shaving

24:10

and he finds a little piece of metal sticking out of his cheek it's not really explained why

24:16

well okay there are possible explanations we'll get to it but you don't know why initially

24:22

yeah yeah as soon as he touches it blood just like explodes on the side of his face

24:30

yeah i'm not sure how it's done but it actually that is a good effect it's it's genuinely terrifying it's just like as

24:35

soon it's like the gentlest touch and it's just like yeah

24:41

so he puts a bandage on his face and then he brews some coffee i guess it's a

24:46

weird little brewing device maybe they're more common in japan it was cool looking yeah i don't know what that is

24:53

i initially was more interested in the fact that this guy has so many cats yeah

25:02

one of them meets an unfortunate end later on well okay yeah i wonder if those are just the

25:08

director's cats and he just didn't want to have to lock them in another room during filming he's like yeah whatever you can just wander around i assume so

25:15

although it's kind of funny because like the scene is kind of shot in a way that i feel like it kind of emphasizes

25:23

this kind of like oppressive cramped nature of his head conditions

25:29

it is very funny to think that's that's actually just how the director lives

25:34

yeah i mean i found out later that a lot of the people filming were just living

25:39

in his apartment as they filmed it so like they were just they never escaped they were just always

25:46

eating or filming or probably arguing so

25:51

yeah he's maybe i should get get the book because i feel like i feel like the

25:56

filming of this movie would be really interesting to learn yeah we talked about this before i uh

26:01

before we started recording and i am i do feel bad i wanted to bring out the book about this movie well it's actually

26:08

about all of sukamoto's films or most of them but i looked it up on amazon there's only

26:13

one for sale and it's two hundred dollars for the paperback so you know i wasn't about to do that i

26:20

was i was hoping to just be able to get like you know the the the read preview where you can read a few pages

26:25

i just wanted a sense of yeah of what it was like to be in this movie

26:30

although there is there is some juicy chunks in the wikipedia entry for this where they're just talking about how

26:36

miserable everyone was and how the the entire crew left by the end of the movie

26:42

yeah the guy who played the businessman i think his name is uh tomorrow or something like that

26:48

he said that he was able to endure it because he lived in a different location he was just like i noticed that everyone

26:53

who lived with him eventually wanted to escape so i thought that i could you know endure it better if i live

26:59

somewhere else it's just like a it's like they were doing filming like as a form of

27:06

flagellation you know they're just like oh well we have to endure this horror to make this exist

27:11

i yeah i mean that's what makes it so interesting though because i feel like that requires a certain amount of

27:18

belief in the project at least for the actors everyone else

27:23

eventually gave up well yeah yeah by the end of it the two main

27:29

characters were taking turns holding the camera it was like that you know they had to light each other

27:35

yeah oh those poor souls they finished though that's the other thing a lot of people would have just given up and you could

27:41

tell that this movie is a sheer act of will no i will finish this movie yeah

27:49

i can't remember is kanji script read vertically because i noticed that the businessman is reading a newspaper up

27:55

and down it's all folded up in a weird way um okay i know just enough to know that i

28:02

have no idea okay i'm sorry i don't mean to assume i don't know no no there's yeah there there was like

28:08

a whole revision point i think where they started

28:13

doing it more in western style okay i don't i don't like i said i don't know

28:21

fully i just know enough to know that i i don't know about that subject

28:26

this isn't even like an important part of the movie but i'm just fascinated with like you know weird little japanese things that i get to view

28:32

yeah this movie has a few of those and while he's reading the paper he's having what i refer to as a

28:39

non-conversational over the phone with his girlfriend where they just say mahi mahi and moshi

28:45

moshi to each other just back and forth like 40 times that's how you know they're in love

28:56

it was so bizarre i i kind of liked it because i was just like yeah we could write some dialogue here

29:01

but whatever who cares just just say hello a lot yeah i mean i think the intent just kind

29:07

of showed that their relationship is a little fun touring at this point which i think

29:13

that maybe does a good job of like conveying

29:18

they cut to uh a grainy clip of businessman and what i assume is the girlfriend on the phone having some sexy

29:24

time out in the forest yeah which is the first time they cut to this scene but not the last it's like

29:30

throughout the whole thing so you cut back to the

29:36

business man on the phone he's sweating really heavily i mean it looks more like they use a water bottle

29:42

and just sprayed water on his face yeah the woman on the other end asked if he is okay

29:48

and she says things have felt strange since the accident which is great so i don't know maybe they're awkward

29:54

with each other because they're both trying to process you know uh them well you know the spoiler alert the

30:00

murder yeah yeah i guess it's more of an accident that

30:06

becomes a murder i don't know it's it's sort of a negligent no okay yeah i guess

30:12

yeah yeah let's get let's get into it when we get to it yeah

30:17

okay so the businessman takes the subway he's still sweating profusely i mean

30:23

honestly everybody's sweating in every scene it's pretty gross i will say i'm i'm very looking forward

30:30

to hearing how you describe uh what happens next okay yeah so uh

30:36

i wrote notes where i make some assumptions and some of these are wrong so please you know correct me as i go

30:43

but i mean some of this is just surface observations because i didn't even know what to make of what was happening

30:51

yeah i mean fair enough man so he sits down on a subway bench next to a woman who immediately moves the seat away from

30:57

him i know that vibe i was with her on that i mean he's like sweating profusely he's got like a bandage on his face he looks

31:04

weird she's like i'm just gonna sit over here it's weird because like it's a little

31:10

rude but then again it kind of shows that and because this lady doesn't get to do anything

31:15

this is the only normal thing she gets to do let's put it that way so maybe this is just a show like

31:20

normally i'm sane but this is you know this is the one thing i'll do just to be

31:26

like i know to be free of a strange man you know who's sweating profusely on in a subway station

31:33

i think in general i feel weird when someone just sits down right next to me and i would probably move over

31:40

yeah it's like going into a movie theater by yourself and you're the only one in there and then someone else comes

31:46

in and just sits next to you excuse me sir

31:51

[Laughter] yeah yeah like if that happened it would feel like i'd be so mad they were doing

31:57

it to me like it was on purpose yeah i would almost want that for like a candid camera like kind of a thing

32:04

ashton kutcher would have to come out you've been punked you've been made mildly uncomfortable by

32:09

a stranger so okay so there's not really an establishing shot of what happens here

32:16

so this is very confusing to me so she just looks down to the left she

32:21

sees a lump of something it's a like metal and flesh it's like a ball and it's just laying there

32:28

i don't know how it got there and it's never explained she goes

32:34

as if to poke it which i like because she then thinks better of it and grabs a

32:39

pen or something something that looks like a pen and so she's gonna poke it with that

32:45

instead i'm just like i'm glad you're thinking of that you're already better than the homeless man from the blob

32:50

movie where he just goes and touches it with his hand yeah peter you're missing an important

32:57

detail about the chunk of metal is there perhaps

33:03

something inside the chunk of metal that's worth commenting um maybe

33:09

uh okay so it does go to clips of a shivering

33:14

dark-skinned looking burned man under wreckage i don't know if the wreckage is inside

33:21

of the ball of flesh or if it's in another location it's not clear i think it's in another location

33:27

so he might it might be controlling the lump of flesh remotely

33:34

i thought so but i also thought that he is in there but it's in a more

33:40

allegorical sense his influences in there yeah and like just like depicted by him

33:46

being literally so yeah i mean at this point you don't see the person's face they're laying away from us and they're

33:51

shivering it reminded me of that the fetus under the uh the subway in harry

33:56

potter in the very last movie yeah it's just shimmering shape

34:03

uh peter what have you not seen the last harry potter no

34:08

oh well spoiler for that whole franchise but you know there's a part where uh voldemort

34:15

you sort of see his true form and it's under a subway and it's just a weird little fetus it kind of shows like how

34:21

bereft his soul is that he's this little vulnerable weak creature because he kept dividing up his soul into the horcruxes

34:28

okay also i apologize this is a horror podcast but i'm sort of geeky about everything so you're just gonna have to

34:34

accept when i go into tangents about anything really

34:39

i mean i think that's fine yeah but i apologize in advance if i ever go into a franchise that you don't care for

34:47

be it star trek or star wars or the mcu or harry potter

34:52

or the simpsons or god knows what you should see that scene if you if you haven't seen it though the the weird

34:59

little shivering voldemort fetus is pretty cool all right well just

35:04

search voldemort it's the part google image server safe search let's see what comes up

35:11

taking off all the guardrails i don't i don't know which one of these

35:17

is fake or not it's unclear because the even the real one looks fake okay yeah

35:24

uh i'm going to assume that all these are sure

35:29

at any rate it's just a weird little shivering shape in a subway like in this movie where it's a weird

35:35

little shivering japanese man under some wreckage either in

35:40

either in a meat wad or influencing a meat wad oh you know what it looks like

35:46

looks like the creature from pumpkin head yeah also that yeah that's another apt comparison

35:52

before they they bury him in the pumpkin yard

35:58

so anyway woman sees a lump of flesh she goes to poke it with a little pen

36:03

it cuts to businessman sitting there and he hears a weird little odd like scratching noise and he turns to see

36:09

that the metal wad has attached itself to the woman's hand despite her best efforts to use a pen

36:15

and she also has a misshapen forehead now which may or may not mean she is now a cyber zombie

36:23

i mean right i don't i don't know she seems controlled or mindless i'm not really sure

36:30

i mean i don't think it's a matter of being a zombie but i do think that like when you kind of when the characters get kind of meddled

36:36

out they do have that weird kind of thinking stuff going on in our foreheads the

36:41

fetishist has it salaryman does yeah so businessman flees metal hand lady i'm

36:49

i'm sorry to be using these pathetic pronouns but there are no names for anyone so this is this is how it be

36:57

um she is credited as woman in glasses oh okay

37:03

i just want to point out that just throughout the whole movie everything even the normal stuff looks dirty and

37:10

horrible i kind of love it it's like the director just found the worst parts of his

37:16

prefecture in japan somewhere which is like where's the the most horrible looking places i can find

37:24

oh i need a bereft cement stairwell that's just chipping paint and just

37:30

corroded guardrails yeah it is kind of interesting because i

37:35

i mean i guess maybe this is just my uh cultural perception as an outsider but i

37:41

feel like japan is generally depicted as a a pretty clean

37:46

country yeah so this kind of interesting to me how many just very gross and grammy places

37:52

they managed to find yeah it's impressive to be honest the businessman flees

37:59

the lady follows businessman hides in some kind of a metal-graded closet in a

38:04

rancid-looking back room of some kind of a public bathroom i think

38:11

i don't know dude your guess is as good as mine there's almost no establishing shots in

38:17

this movie so i don't know where a lot of things are throughout my nearest guess is that it's where

38:25

and janitor would keep their equipment yeah i'm not sure why it would be

38:30

in the back i've seen greats like that around gym areas like for gym equipment and in high schools because you need to

38:37

put all the basketball somewhere yeah where the kids can't grab them and start throwing them around when they're not supposed to

38:43

so maybe maybe that's it maybe it's like a like a cram school or something like it's some horrible filthy locker room

38:50

but it's like so near to the subway well i mean we don't know i mean this could be filmed in totally different

38:56

places but yeah in the context of the movie it doesn't make sense i guess it could be a public bathroom in the subway that just

39:02

has a weird graded area for the janitor so the middle hand lady follows him in

39:10

you know while he's cowering in the grated area she like goes over the grate and pulls

39:16

off her own ear with her hand which is pretty great yeah i approve

39:21

it's gross but it is a pretty cool shot when the ear hits toilet water and blood all spreads out and

39:33

which i'm not normally a huge fan of yeah okay so businessman pulls out his own

39:39

pen i guess everyone's got a pen and he stabs her in the neck through the grate

39:44

yeah oh yeah this is when i noticed that the fight music almost sounds like a sped up version of john carpenter's halloween

39:50

theme you know a little bit it's not that

39:57

it's not quite no it's not it's not a ripoff but i don't know i felt like it suggested it

40:02

a little bit you know i'm not against it sure and it's not like the halloween theme is all that original to begin with

40:07

you know it's just a handful of notes sure yeah i i didn't notice that but i can kind of see where you're coming from

40:13

yeah if you guys want you go back and listen to when we played the trailer it is in there somewhere they used almost

40:18

the entire soundtrack in the trailer yeah businessman tries to escape the middle

40:25

hand lady i mean she seems dead but she's not so she gets up and she just just kicks his ass like really kicks him

40:33

great knees and like throwing him around and like i don't know it seems like she's like

40:38

some kind of expert in martial combat or something yeah and i think being a horrible metal

40:44

monster is definitely working in your favor here that's probably true yeah

40:52

so yeah she chokes him with one hand you know lifts him off his feet and goes to finish him with the robo hand

40:58

and it seems like he's finished but then he's not

41:04

uh suddenly he's rocketing home in crazy fast forward through the tunnels and out into the

41:11

streets it looks really cool but it makes it unclear about

41:16

uh if that's what it felt like to him as he ran home you know like maybe he got free and you

41:23

know and then he you know everything's a blur to him because of how scared he was that kind of makes sense well okay so when that when he stops

41:30

moving the actor clearly has fireworks taped to his shoes

41:37

he got kind of like kicks him out so i think the idea is he has some kind of

41:43

mechanical method of moving really fast possibly i mean yeah because it yeah which

41:49

which does track with later on yeah if that's the case that makes it makes a certain sense for later

41:55

yeah it would be weird that he manifested so early but yeah whatever somehow he gets home he makes it to his

42:02

garage or what i at least assume is his garage we've never established it before

42:07

um but as he goes to close the garage door the lady's robo hand lifts it back up so i guess she can just get places

42:13

really fast too because she's right there yeah she stumbles in kind of see this is what

42:19

made me think she was kind of a zombie because she's got a real kind of loose kind of lopey stance you

42:24

know like she can't have full control of her muscles yeah well i mean the it'll make itself more clear at the

42:31

moment but uh i will say i uh i do like the

42:37

physicality of her performance she does a good job of i don't know like she doesn't get a lot to say so like

42:45

her characterization all kind of comes across from what she's doing and how she's doing it i don't know

42:52

she worked well with what she got yeah yeah you described her in the cast list as a woman with glasses right yes

42:58

although she does not have glasses at this point that's what i was about to say because when she stumbles in she she takes off her glasses and then she sort

43:04

of leers at him and i was just like wait a minute what are we doing here

43:10

yeah she goes and grabs him and keeps telling him to come on i don't know if that's what that translates in japan

43:15

like if it has some kind of a connotation but um i don't know it seemed weird my

43:22

impression is that she wants him to like fight back in some way

43:28

yeah maybe just like terrorizing him isn't that's no good here's what i was thinking i i just wrote is this some

43:34

kind of a mating ritual okay i will say she does lean in very

43:41

close so i could kind of well i don't mean to infer that like just because a man and a woman are fighting it has to

43:46

be some kind of weird psychosexual thing but no but i just thought that like okay so

43:51

here's what i thought for the first half of the movie that i thought you know that there was

43:56

going to be this weird thing about the bizarreness of men and women interacting with each other because

44:02

that's what most of the first half is about weird awkward moments and then it devolves into fantasy violence and

44:09

extremity you know like i don't know i i thought that's what they were going for but i guess that's

44:14

not the case because it does sort of change later it's interesting to look at those scenes through that lens

44:20

but we do get some more clips of that blackened body writhing around under the wreckage so i mean i i guess it's it's

44:26

that guy's influence it's not her so maybe maybe i'm just wrong yeah yeah

44:31

and also there's like a brief shot breeze laying in some kind of very dirty

44:37

looking liquid yeah that seems very unsanitary i don't know what they actually did to do that but yeah

44:44

it's very gross i don't know if i would have agreed to do that although i guess it was the director so

44:50

i mean nobody that's true yeah it was that was that's sukamoto everybody

44:57

yeah if this was a youtube video i'd have like a thumbnail and just put a big red

45:02

circle over tsukumoto like lying in a pile of filth there he is

45:08

okay so businessman puts metal hand lady into a savage bear hug that just seems

45:14

to crush her bones so i guess he's strong or her bones are weak i don't know which one it is maybe both

45:20

i think it's his he's strong yeah and then he gives her an epic punch which seems to kill her

45:26

question mark i mean i i think uh yeah and then it just goes to a scene of

45:34

of the businessman writhing and squirming in a super miserable looking stairwell and there's like this soothing

45:40

music playing i don't know what's happening yeah i was just thinking you know as they're

45:47

filming this they're just like okay i need you to have maximum energy for this

45:52

scene uh director sukamoto um what what am i to do i just need a lot of energy

45:59

energy okay it needs to go for about two minutes yeah but i mean why am i doing

46:04

this what what does this mean like just just energy

46:10

that would be even more impressive i mean i like i i like this guy's

46:17

performance even though oh yeah he's good yeah he he doesn't i mean he is just kind of the salary man

46:23

i'm not going to say they don't give him a lot to do but that is kind of the extent of his character he carries the movie such as it is i mean he has almost

46:30

no character development yeah he does his best yeah okay so

46:36

next scene out on the street businessman i guess we could call him salary man he discovers metallic

46:43

protuberances on his right arm and on his right heel yeah oh man a pipe in his heel can emit

46:50

sparks wicked i think that's supposed to be some kind of like yeah that's very he's living no

46:58

i mean by the end you know for sure it's 100 rocket boots but i mean coming into this movie and you're like

47:04

that is not the first thought you would have you're just like i don't think no would just manifest rockets out of

47:11

like a horrible wound it's not running on anything i mean it's

47:16

not like he's got rocket fuel in his veins or anything it's just like what is it magic

47:21

that's a little bit more sense than i think this movie deserves yeah

47:27

so then there's more super fast travel shots of businessman gliding through a japanese

47:33

prefecture i think it looks pretty cool it probably took a really long time to do because they had to do still shots of

47:39

just endless scenes yeah it's a very cheap effect but i do like

47:45

it like there's something kind of charming it reminds me of those google van guys who have to drive around the

47:50

world taking pictures of streets just so we can all have 360 views of everything

47:58

it reminds me of here just describe what happens next

48:05

uh let me see oh well okay yeah here we go [Laughter]

48:13

next c uh okay so it's weird because the way i write

48:18

things i'm so innocuous and innocent when i'm writing my notes for these reviews

48:24

i didn't know what was gonna happen i i'm just gonna say that right now all

48:29

right i absolve myself i don't know yeah for the record

48:35

he didn't know this was all me blame jacob okay so there's a strange montage of intense

48:42

close-ups of the businessman that kind of transitioned into some sort of a fever-dream fantasy of a burned woman

48:49

or maybe she has dark skin i don't know what it's supposed to be um i don't think she's supposed to be burned

48:55

um yeah is it ganguro or something or i don't know what the deal is

49:00

one of the uh the metal finishes it also has the same thing yeah

49:05

weird oily i keep describing them as burned because i thought that was the intention but i don't know

49:12

for whatever reason they're they painted skin i don't think it's a racist reason but it's

49:18

yeah what is it no no no i i mean i i guess my thinking was that they were

49:24

covered in some kind of like greasy lubricant for metal oil or something i thought maybe it

49:30

meant like spiritual possession of some sort or corruption i don't know yeah but then that wouldn't yeah i don't know

49:38

whatever the case i mean i don't think it's terribly relevant yeah so the woman starts to dance around

49:45

but the camera doesn't fully center on her so when so when the curls metallic appendage

49:51

makes its first appearance my first thought was oh cool she has a cybernetic snake

49:57

uh she does not she does she does not

50:05

you you uh poor sweet and a scenario so yeah there's there's no nice way to put this not not

50:12

easily anyway um she has a robotic penis so yeah

50:18

uh prehensile to be clear you can move on yeah i guess it's on a stretchy hose

50:23

like a vacuum attachment yes on the british sci-fi comedy red dwarf the android crichton had a similar

50:30

attachment although his could actually vacuum things up

50:36

i'm sad to say that was the very first thing that i thought of not that it was a strap-on

50:42

or whatever but it's just like oh hey it's like it's like creighton's thing from redwood

50:49

um so yeah um he uh so he the businessman is is naked

50:57

the the attachment penis like snakes all over his back and again i thought perhaps desperately

51:04

that that would be the end of it you know be like oh well they'll be a little suggestive but then it'll just be over right yeah

51:12

no uh it's not and i don't want to dwell on what happens next i'm just gonna so i'm just gonna real quickly

51:19

yeah so okay so he yeah he's well what's the what's the nice term he's sodomized by uh brutally sodomized

51:27

yeah okay you're you're a yes yeah he

51:33

he's regularly sodomized he was brutally sorry yeah he yeah it's a non-consensual situation

51:39

it's kind of horrible and it it goes on just long enough to burn itself into

51:45

your mind forever you're welcome it's that thing you know like again it's like that giallo thing you

51:51

know where like you watch a knife just slowly go into a wound or something or into an eyeball or you're just like oh

51:56

my god please cut away you know yeah except instead of a knife going into a wound it's uh

52:06

it's not quite that graphic but it's graphic enough and yeah and it goes on for too long but

52:11

like not quite long enough for someone for your average viewer to get up and discuss and leave the room it seemed

52:17

like it was designed just to be enough to like right before you get out of your chair oh god

52:23

and then they cut away you know yeah and then we all find out that

52:28

businessman was dreaming so it's not even real or well okay it might have been real but

52:34

it's not clear i don't know part of it might be real i don't think it was real

52:41

or at least that part okay yeah the appendage part doesn't seem to be real because it doesn't come up later he

52:46

still has the bandage on his face so that part is totally true i mean this is just me like working it out afterwards

52:53

and then okay yeah and he's still got the cybernetic ankle so basically just that one scene is just thrown in there

53:00

with no consequence and no real relation to anything yeah i suppose it doesn't really matter

53:06

at all it's almost like it didn't need to be there but no so i'm not saying i i hate the movie for

53:15

it but it does it certainly changes who can watch it like immediately because for whatever reason we are all

53:21

as a society or at least in america we're less offended by blood and gore and violence

53:27

but but certain kinds of sexual acts are just like oh okay you know like

53:33

right off the bat like oh all right yeah

53:38

he wakes up from the dream in bed with his girlfriend who i think is the woman in his dream it is the same lady right

53:46

yes it is the same lady okay so i don't know maybe they had a normal

53:51

sexual encounter but he thought of it as a weird violation i mean again that kind of reinforced my original thought that

53:56

this was about alienation of humanity to one another you know between men and women

54:02

yeah i like where you're going with that it's just that not to spoil it too much but the movie

54:09

kind of abandons the idea of being about anything towards yeah or at least not

54:14

about this also i want to say right now even though this doesn't make sense yet uh that this

54:20

woman is my favorite character in this movie yeah i love this girlfriend it's a fun

54:26

performance i mean she she has pretty striking looks for her it's weird though because

54:32

i looked it up she's only been in like five movies that's more than i thought i figured this would be a one

54:38

and done actually i mean i guess it's hard to say off of one performance but i feel like people have done more and yeah

54:43

and i i think she's great in this as her normal self so yeah it's in the bed she looks normal

54:49

her skin isn't covered in grease or whatever businessman goes to the bathroom and

54:56

picks the wound on his cheek and the areas just starts making an unhealthy whirring sound like a dentist drill

55:05

and then his entire right cheek is a horrible bloody mess but then it cuts to a scene of the two

55:10

having sexy time and his face just looks kind of normal again so i maybe just covered it up

55:16

again with the bandage yeah i think so i thought it was a minor continuity error but maybe

55:22

this this is gross but maybe he he opened the wound and then just closed it i don't know

55:28

yeah or maybe they just forgot as they were filming or they filmed it in a different sequence and just like threw

55:33

it in there i don't really buy that because i feel like too much of this movie

55:38

is so deliberate it does have a very deliberate feel so i guess yeah maybe i ultimately don't believe that

55:45

i think it's just easier to say he covered it up yeah in the heat of passion the lady rips

55:51

open a bandage revealing metally stuff on the business man's arm so then they stop having sex and uh

55:59

businessman cooks the ladies some sausage and eggs in a frying pan

56:05

and just knocks over bottles and junk on the table to put the still steaming hot pan in

56:11

front of her the movie is so strange and even just normal acts are so weird in this movie

56:18

yeah it doesn't feel like it's doing it specifically to be weird it's just a

56:25

weird thing that happens well it could also just mean that the director is kind of a maniac and he doesn't understand

56:30

what normal humans are like yeah which is like i mean which makes sense and is honestly

56:36

i think to the movie's credit yeah so peter you forgot that he also feeds

56:42

her some sausage no no we're not there yet yeah so he feeds her one fork at a time

56:49

of eggs or something it looks horrible whatever it is he acts like he's feeding some foreign

56:55

animal like he's afraid of her i don't know why because there's been no

57:01

indication for him to feel that way he just does every time she takes a bite there's a crazy metallic sound effect like

57:07

grinding and stuff and then he offers her a little hot dog and she takes her time

57:13

she's really licking it yeah yeah very suggestively before

57:20

eating it i hear that they don't sell regular sized hot dogs in japan

57:25

uh no yeah because i saw a show about the famous competitive eater takero kabayashi

57:31

and how he had to buy wimpy little sausages to practice to compete in nathan's hot dog eating contest

57:38

he ended up winning that six times by the way he was debased

57:44

he was also a little deformed that's one of those things they don't like to talk about but he has like um a strangely

57:49

placed stomach so he's able to hold more food you know if i've heard like there was i

57:55

can't remember her name but there's a uh it was another japanese i don't think she did like competitions

58:02

to just do like youtube videos but she would just stuff away like 4 000 calories of food

58:10

in a video and she'd just be fine and she would just never gain any weight it was very disturbing to watch

58:16

interesting so businessman tosses the pan into the sink even though

58:23

it's still mostly full of food why didn't he eat any i feel like he should be hungry after all of the

58:28

activity they've had it's also uh as we've previously established very

58:33

gross food yeah oh no wait i don't think it is on the sink because later on the pan is still hot or perhaps it's a

58:39

different pan because once again there's almost no establishing shots in this movie to show where stuff is so

58:45

maybe he just puts it back on the pan to reheat it i don't know why he would do that either though

58:52

i don't know it doesn't matter so anyway so he embraces her and asks that she never

58:57

leave him and then suddenly his body contorts and spasms

59:03

and then he manifests a well a drill bit that literally drills through the table

59:10

yes stuff tries to emerge from his chest and back through his shirt so he leaves the

59:16

room i think that's good manners anytime you're werewolfing out you

59:22

should just excuse yourself and go to the bathroom or something yeah

59:27

he chose some character on his part well not just on his part on her part too because he starts acting weird and

59:32

she doesn't freak out the girlfriend she okay i want to call her something else i want to establish that right now i don't

59:39

like calling her just the girlfriend but that is literally her casting name so well she's also known as

59:46

a woman yeah so you can sometimes i refer to her as lady in my notes so maybe i'll just go

59:53

with that okay yeah so so lady doesn't scream or flee instead she just goes to see what's up

59:59

with businessman i love that this girl is ride or die you know

1:00:05

kind of yeah i mean i feel like once you once you pull out the drill deck that's

1:00:10

kind of it for a lot of relationships yeah but she's just like let me in nothing much scares me

1:00:17

which i thought was some some epic girlfriending right there i was just like man this lady is awesome

1:00:24

he sticks out a robo hand to try to scare her away and be like oh look at my scary hand you can't come in

1:00:30

but it doesn't work she just breaks the lock literally breaks the lock with her foot and just goes inside

1:00:37

so he's hiding in the corner under a blanket she hugs him and tries to reassure him that she can't be scared by anything she

1:00:44

might see but then he reveals his face and she just immediately flips out like ah

1:00:49

i mean i can't blame him like at least she tried you know i mean she's like listen i will i will deal

1:00:55

with whatever this might be and then when you see you're like oh jesus christ it is gross yeah

1:01:02

i mean also i mean it doesn't occur to anyone because it's a movie but i mean he he kind of looks contagious you know

1:01:07

it's like i don't know if i want to hang yeah yeah i might get metal itis

1:01:14

businessman now that she screamed at him he seems to lose his mind and just comes after her

1:01:20

with his deadly drill member and she grabs the still hot frying pan

1:01:26

out of the kitchen and sets it on his face and i just wrote this got out of hand really fast

1:01:33

it really escalates so then he or some robotic extension of

1:01:38

himself grabs the frying pan away from her they struggle a bit he grabs her hair she repeatedly plunges

1:01:45

the knife into his thigh which like never comes up again so i guess he's fine

1:01:50

more stuff erupts from his back he stumbles over it inserts a fork into an electrical

1:01:55

socket which rather than kill him it just makes him stronger like it seems like he likes

1:02:01

it yeah maybe his rocket boots are run on electricity

1:02:08

maybe but that's also getting into sense which has very little

1:02:14

place in this yeah it seems almost like he's doing it at first electrocuting himself is like a

1:02:19

form of punishment but then he kind of finds he sort of likes it or maybe it's giving him power it's not really clear

1:02:25

yeah and then this is when i wrote sadly like this is where we've come to in this way i just said this film is

1:02:32

really committed to this guy's drill penis because they just keep showing it oh come on guys like i didn't know it

1:02:39

was going to be this kind of movie i mean kind of i mean sorry

1:02:45

i hate to tell you folks they're drill penis it ain't going away no it really isn't

1:02:51

it is here to stay so he sticks the fork that he just put into the outlet he just sticks it into

1:02:57

his face i guess just to add to the collection he's very hunchbacked and misshapen now

1:03:02

yeah he grabs his girlfriend and says you want a taste of my sewage pipe

1:03:08

which just seems inaccurate that's not what it is yeah i mean i suppose we don't need to dwell on that

1:03:13

too i mean granted none of it has a clear purpose but i don't think any of it has

1:03:19

that purpose let's put it in it just leave it there sure yeah so the poor girlfriend stabs

1:03:26

at him unsuccessfully a few times before scoring a blow deep into his neck he falls over

1:03:32

he seems like he might be dead for a minute because his his drill member stops membering like it stops spinning

1:03:38

yeah yeah i thought he was dead but i guess not so the lady girlfriend like

1:03:45

she crawls on him and licks his face and then they kiss for a while

1:03:53

young love i guess right i mean you know you got your highs you got your yeah

1:03:59

i mean yeah i do feel like this it's intended to be a uh a murder suicide at this point

1:04:06

yeah i guess so then the businessman falls asleep or or something

1:04:11

time passes somehow and he seems to wake up or become conscious and find that

1:04:16

blood is spraying all over the lady his drill has revived itself with a vengeance and it's taken his toll on her

1:04:24

and she falls down appearing to be dead i started writing that now like when

1:04:29

things happen i just like it appears to be that because it keeps contradicting itself later which is like okay well

1:04:34

maybe that didn't happen she's probably dead guys uh yes

1:04:41

and now that all of that is over with businessman lowers himself into a bath and a bunch of steam comes up i do like

1:04:47

that effect every scene

1:04:53

of this movie is just exhausting and overwhelming

1:04:58

even lowering himself into a bathtub it's just like oh god it's like you can't have a moment of joy

1:05:04

it's like even that's gotta be weird and intense yeah so that's that's enough for businessman for

1:05:10

a while we're gonna go to another character a one that we didn't know existed

1:05:15

so you cut to a scene of a metal scrap yard in a warehouse or

1:05:20

or maybe outside i'm not sure the man from the start i think it's the metal fetishist he

1:05:26

emerges from the wreckage with a torch in his hand and he just announces to the camera i am healed which i guess means

1:05:33

he's healed yes he's blackened and scarred i keep saying

1:05:39

blackened i don't know what you know he's got stuff all over him i like my grease and oil yeah i feel

1:05:46

like some keeping with it could be that the whole like machine thing

1:05:51

yeah so yeah he gets up he says he's healed but then he falls down again dropping the torch

1:05:58

i don't know why that was he's like so you establish that he's okay and then he's not okay and then he falls over

1:06:04

and then a tv reveals itself from amongst the scrap wires just part and then like a tv

1:06:10

screen lights up and there's just an old guy in kind of like a wife beater tank top and like an

1:06:16

over shirt and he's just like what the hell is going on which is great because that's exactly

1:06:22

what the audience is saying at this point you're just like i don't i don't know what this is yeah he the old guy is watching this movie he

1:06:28

speaks for all of us yeah he's just like this is unbelievable he then tells

1:06:35

the metal fetishist i believe he is yeah that there's a piece of metal stuck in the metal collector's brain

1:06:41

and he'll die if it's removed and so he just says think of it as jewelry

1:06:47

i don't remember their ever establishing metals in his brain i guess it could have happened from the accident but it also could have happened

1:06:53

from a prior traumatic event you know that gets revealed later i guess

1:07:00

yeah i think that's the idea so maybe maybe a prior head injury gave him

1:07:07

psychokinetic metallic powers question mark

1:07:12

yes i mean i think that's what they're going for yeah it makes him an akira for lack of a better term

1:07:20

yeah speaking of quite a bit of a restraint on both of our parts oh i'm not mentioning akira

1:07:28

well yeah because movies name tense that's true well i've seen that movie like once 20

1:07:34

years ago i've forgotten almost everything about it except for except for how bored i was

1:07:40

[Laughter] i do like that movie but like

1:07:46

it is very clearly part one of a very larger story yeah it seems like it was set up for a bunch of

1:07:52

stuff that never happened well which is literally true the comic goes on

1:07:58

way beyond that oh okay which is weird because it's like it was

1:08:03

a pretty well regarded movie despite that they just never made a sequel i don't know why i think it just

1:08:09

cost too much money yeah probably okay so

1:08:15

this is the point in the film where i just wrote i do not hate this movie but it is 38 minutes in and i really just

1:08:22

want it to be over each scene is like a really intense

1:08:27

little art film and each piece is quite interesting but together yes it's just

1:08:35

it's just agony well i don't want to say that it's it's just real hard on you you know when you're watching it

1:08:42

it's a lot to digest all at once it's like dense with intensity

1:08:49

so we cut back to the business man and he's grown a full suit of metallic slag

1:08:54

to the point where only a little bit of his face is now visible i think there's several versions of his

1:09:00

body suit and so this is kind of his first full one yeah it seems to give him a cool anatomy i mean like he's got

1:09:06

almost like a six-pack now i'm like yeah cool yeah that's true but then they kind of

1:09:12

panned down and he still got the drill penis and i'm just like we still gotta be i thought that was

1:09:19

transitional i mean why are we still doing this and it's like his greatest power too

1:09:24

throughout the whole movie i mean that's one of the best parts

1:09:30

it surprises everyone so he's built a little a sad little

1:09:35

death shrine for his dead girlfriend by he's placed her in the bathtub and garlanded her with pretty little flowers

1:09:43

and i just wrote rip girlfriend lady you were the best of us

1:09:48

it was really nice of him he also put the knife back in her hand and posed her with the knife you know

1:09:54

just like this is what i was doing when i died

1:09:59

yeah there is something i if i want to call it sweet yeah it's thoughtful in a way

1:10:04

yeah yeah it's like burying a warrior with his weapons

1:10:10

so he leans into her for what i at first thought was like a nice little kiss but then a horrible over positor emerges

1:10:18

from his mouth and just goes into her mouth and she's like oh jesus christ why why movie

1:10:25

what does this even mean the phone rings

1:10:31

the business man clamors over and picks it up and he just hears it yeah i drop dead you metal

1:10:36

freak drop dead so i think that's the metal fetish is giving him like a crank call

1:10:43

so then footage of what i assume is the car accident starts to play on his tv somehow i don't know how

1:10:50

it's being fed in but it's cool i'm glad that there's at least some coherency of storyline in this i was

1:10:57

surprised at this point i thought it was going to be nothing so when it was something i'm like yes

1:11:04

i mean granted i have no way of explaining this i mean i guess the metal fetishist can just manifest his death

1:11:10

moments to the person that killed him to make him feel bad sure like transferring his memories

1:11:16

through the electronic devices it's the astral projection of his last

1:11:22

moments either that or it's businessman's shame and guilt and he's

1:11:28

putting it there himself but it's from the other guy's point of view so i i tend to think it's the metal

1:11:33

fetishist yeah yeah he's hit by their car you know as we

1:11:38

already know and he's dragged for quite a while you see his hand sticking out from like above the hood and he goes for

1:11:44

yeah well it seems like a minute it's just like oh my god and then he doesn't die and that's the

1:11:50

worst part of this flashback not dead yeah so businessman steps out

1:11:56

to look at him you know at his accident victim and his girlfriend joins him and rather than call for help they just

1:12:03

load him into the back seat of their car and keep stealing weird looks at him we're like oh man he's dying back there

1:12:10

and they just he's watching us yeah well yeah we'll get to that but yeah so

1:12:15

yeah they just they just take them out to the woods they're like oh listen we really hurt this guy but i don't want to have to deal with like the paperwork or

1:12:22

telling them it was an accident i mean the guy did just run out into the street i mean he had a he had a wound they

1:12:28

could just be like he was crazy we couldn't have stopped if he wanted to but no they just put him out in the

1:12:33

woods to let him die but something about that i mean like it's just it just really turns them both on

1:12:40

they're like wow look at him dying there we should have sex like right next to

1:12:45

him on this tree and then he can watch us really just blew my mind

1:12:52

i yeah wow that's kind of amazing i mean because

1:12:58

even though there's no character development that is so heinous and insane that suddenly you can yeah yeah

1:13:05

relate to the battle fetishist you're like what what were you guys doing

1:13:11

yeah i will say that is kind of funny within that one scene the metal face just kind of goes from

1:13:17

like an insane guy to like yeah no i'd be pissed too yeah yeah

1:13:22

yeah i might haunt him with metal or something yeah

1:13:28

so businessman powers up some more by plugging into an electric socket again his adversary the

1:13:35

the metal collector grooms himself in like a reflective surface he like puts on like kabuki makeup or something

1:13:41

yeah and then the metal collector just fast forward glides through the prefecture annihilating and corroding metal objects

1:13:48

as he goes by which is pretty cool hey yeah i also love that he has

1:13:55

some flowers in his hands yeah okay he wants to go you know say hello

1:14:00

with some with some dignity and some politeness yeah i wanted to see a clip of an old

1:14:06

man watering his lawn and then like his mailbox just decays in front of him like

1:14:12

ah you you punk kids or like a little kid on like a tricycle

1:14:18

and then it just like collapses under him oh hey

1:14:23

yeah this is when i finally got mad with the movie and i was just like i haven't looked it up yet so i

1:14:29

have no idea which character is tetsuo the iron man i should have looked up the definition

1:14:36

i'm sorry everyone i didn't know i didn't know i mean i guess you if you really want to

1:14:42

think about it everyone is kind of the iron man in this movie well there's at least two

1:14:47

so maybe it's iron men you know like it's plural sure yeah or maybe i don't know maybe

1:14:53

the metal collector is more the iron man but he really encases the other guy in a lot more metal than he ever gets in it

1:15:00

well until the end i guess sort of spoiler yeah

1:15:06

i'm going over seeing some movie i really love the corrosive effect where they kind of like

1:15:12

um speed up the filming and i forgot that they uh had those little toy cars that ended up

1:15:19

melding to the cats yeah yeah i just ca i could i couldn't help but think that that would be such a pain to get off

1:15:26

them yeah i felt really bad for that cat because i i don't think the director was was nice about it you know

1:15:33

yeah i mean i don't know you hope so and it doesn't seem like it's it's agreeing to be in the situation it gets

1:15:40

like pinned to a wall by metal it's just like ah no yeah

1:15:45

yeah i just put robocat question mark okay i guess we'll kind of spoil it the

1:15:52

movie unfortunately does not do much with the concept of a cyborg cat yeah he

1:15:58

should have been a companion at the end you know hanging out with him i'd buy one

1:16:04

so yeah sure businessman turns himself into a giant magnet which really doesn't i don't recall it

1:16:11

really doing anything for him but it's just kind of a neat effect you know where like after he's plugged himself in

1:16:16

enough times it just like starts making metal stuff stick all over the place in his apartment yeah

1:16:22

in his wretched little apartment

1:16:28

so metal starts to spontaneously melt or corrode as you said in his apartment so like all the metal stuff that's flying

1:16:34

around it gets stuck places and then it starts to combine and then the knife in the dead

1:16:39

girlfriend's hand melts over her hand and that seems to revive her

1:16:46

i guess or maybe it gives the metal collector control over her

1:16:52

for like one last hurrah yeah i'm not interested because she comes after him kind of clumsily like

1:16:59

i don't know if she's alive or not well at any rate it doesn't last forever

1:17:04

to be clear i don't think that she was revived i think he was the metal fetishist was using her body i

1:17:11

guess that's why i think in retrospect i think that first lady the lady with the glasses might

1:17:17

also have been remotely controlled oh yeah yeah no for sure because you see

1:17:22

him pull that part over yeah put the

1:17:28

little him inside sure i mean it happens

1:17:34

businessman fights with his dead girlfriend which must be a bummer for him and then suddenly flowers just burst

1:17:41

out of her stomach and then flash rot into mush and then her whole body just

1:17:46

spontaneously melts in really quick succession yeah

1:17:52

out of the pile of her remains the metal collector reconstitutes himself or maybe

1:17:59

teleports in i i don't know was he inside of her or did he come from behind

1:18:05

i don't know uh i assume he managed to find a way to

1:18:10

i guess trans you like i guess like move his body inside of

1:18:17

hers and then use her as like a medium to get out and attack him i don't i mean yeah

1:18:24

it's when he just sort of climbs out of

1:18:30

what's left of her it reminds me of that bbc dracula that

1:18:36

came out not that long ago where that dutch actor guy who was playing dracula he would actually

1:18:42

inhabit bodies of people and then force his way out when he felt like it so he would just rip the body apart and he

1:18:48

would be underneath somehow oh it's really insane how was that it

1:18:55

wasn't bad um the ending is very hasty you can kind of tell that they ran out of time and money and so they just sort

1:19:00

of end it in a way that was not a good idea but it was an interesting take and i saw it

1:19:06

just after i read the original dracula for the first time all the way through so i wasn't as offended as you might

1:19:13

expect i mean usually people are always like oh the book was way better and i guess technically

1:19:18

yeah well okay let's get a controversial horror opinion going

1:19:26

the book dracula is kind of bad sort of well he's just like a foreigner

1:19:34

rapist in it well okay it's there's like that last bit of the book where they

1:19:40

devote a whole lot of time to discussing the

1:19:47

logistics of them traveling to go to defeat dracula yeah

1:19:54

uh which is boring and not fun there's also the whole thing where

1:19:59

we discuss the idea and then like granted this is like pretty standard from the time with horror where like

1:20:06

oh well where they had to like moralize the thing so it was like oh yeah granular is

1:20:12

really powerful but because he's evil he's an idiot yeah he has the brain of a

1:20:18

child and he will be very easy to predict and outsmart which is like

1:20:24

just kind of makes it very obvious that yeah they're just going to defeat dracula there's not going to be any surprises there but then buckle in uh

1:20:33

we're gonna describe the various train stops that we have to make

1:20:38

in order to reach transylvania and the supplies that we'll need to get there dracula once again has deceived us and

1:20:46

cut across budapest traveling towards varna no

1:20:52

like in the book it's not even that in the book it's like yeah they're like we got it

1:20:57

it was just a lazy thing because i think stoker realized he had written a character who was too smart and too

1:21:04

powerful and so he had to have something where he's just like okay and then this wraps up real needy at the end it's like um

1:21:11

an episode of something we're like like the twilight zone or whatever where you have to end it in a half hour so the

1:21:17

villain has to make a really dumb mistake just so that it can end i guess but no i really do think it

1:21:23

relates more to the the moralism of her stories at the time

1:21:28

okay yeah also that and just the general dislike of foreigners well sure but part of the reason that

1:21:34

like horror really only became good

1:21:39

fairly recently in human history like because they would do that stuff where

1:21:46

they would say like okay well we can't have evil be

1:21:52

too menacing or cool or whatever because like we don't want people getting the wrong idea so we

1:21:59

always have to like undercut the evil in some way yeah

1:22:05

that is a hot take jacob hey i don't know i don't know people do like

1:22:10

that book though oh i like it yeah even though it's uh very bad god-awful

1:22:16

and he never did anything else of merit what about the layer of the white worm jacob

1:22:25

yeah got you there right no no i i read that story and there were

1:22:30

some i can't remember see it's been such a long time since i've watched

1:22:35

the movie yeah in the book there was like a lot of attention devoted to this

1:22:41

giant kite and i can't remember what the purpose was i don't know i don't i remember that

1:22:47

being yeah i don't remember the movie to be honest i remember it hinting at things really

1:22:52

cool happening and then they never do well i mean that's what all the best

1:22:58

movies do yeah they just give you the sense that something cool might happen but then they just snatch it away it's too

1:23:04

victorian to really get into the details yeah

1:23:09

next time on gorman on gore who wants to go skinny-dipping

1:23:21

that might be my favorite scene when he just like emerges from the side of the house like

1:23:28

this is a suicide pact these kids are coming out here and they're killing themselves all over the woods oh my god that makes so much sense

1:23:35

also there's a reputation i mean there may or may not have been a lot of murders there so he's making her take

1:23:41

her own crave there's no rules out here it's us against them well i suppose we could go check wiki

1:23:48

feet and sorry what no let's not that's the real horror

1:23:54

tucker and dale versus evil pancakes

1:24:00

all right let's finish this bad boy yes let's finish it yeah

1:24:09

let me work to return yeah it's a short movie i mean it feels really long but i mean when you just describe it i mean

1:24:15

it's only a collection of bizarre scenes so the metal collector tells the

1:24:21

businessman that soon even the businessman's brain will be metal i'm not sure if that's good or bad

1:24:27

bad i guess yeah i'm i wouldn't be a fan to be i want a metal

1:24:32

brain to be honest i think that'd be cool it probably means you can live forever i mean assuming it still works

1:24:37

maybe he just means he'll just become like a statue hard to say so then the metal collector

1:24:42

shows him a vision of a metal world i love this little miniature set that

1:24:48

they've built where it's just like a bunch of little pins and little like circular shapes

1:24:53

it almost looks like a moon set or something look upon your horrible future

1:24:59

silvery little bubbles i almost want to use it as the image for

1:25:05

like any dystopian future and be like look upon your horrible future

1:25:13

i don't know it looks kind of nice kind of like covered in tinsel and stuff it seems almost christmassy uh

1:25:19

that's one interpretation and then the businessman sees a vision of himself reduced to bones by wires

1:25:27

i think i mean i'm not sure if that part happens i don't think so i think it's a vision no

1:25:32

and then the two men head out into the street to fight or rather it's really more just the metal collector pushing him a lot the

1:25:40

businessman just gets pushed all over the place yeah i think

1:25:45

maybe we'll just make that real clear so we talked about themes and

1:25:53

ideas behind what we think the movie was about prior to this

1:25:58

from this point on aside from like a couple of scenes the movie becomes dragon ball z it's a

1:26:06

boss fight or maybe a kaiju fight if you will yeah and it's fun i i like it

1:26:12

it's fun to look at i like both of the designs but

1:26:18

yeah it's just a dbz fight they're flying along one guy's getting pushed by yeah it's

1:26:25

mostly just like magnetic it's like the immovable force versus the unstoppable object no wait i

1:26:31

have that reversed immovable object yeah so i mean you know so the middle collector keeps attacking

1:26:37

him and the the businessman keeps enduring it i guess you know he doesn't really seem to have powers per se he

1:26:43

just sort of doesn't die which i guess is a power oh yeah

1:26:48

so then then we cut to a homeless looking older man i think this is a memory it's not clear

1:26:55

but there's this older man in a lot and he grabs a pipe and it looks like it's probably the same one that the

1:27:01

metal fetishist shoved into his thigh at the beginning of the movie and then he beat someone off screen it's

1:27:08

from the point of view of the person being beaten and it's a little boy's voice being like no no

1:27:16

no daddy though no i assumed it could be his dad or it could just be some random person i don't

1:27:22

know i don't know japanese i don't remember this the subtitles saying anything useful in this regard

1:27:27

i don't think they explain it i think from context it's the little photoshoots the fetish

1:27:35

father it could be he does call him boy which i mean it could be a father thing

1:27:40

yeah and so you know as i said way before the fetishist has a piece of metal in his brain that gives him power

1:27:47

or the tv told him so which means it's that was either him telling himself that or or maybe there really was an expert

1:27:54

who got a tv feed into this guy lying in a scrap yard one day

1:27:59

i don't know so this is one possible explanation this old man is

1:28:05

just laying into this kid with that yeah think like

1:28:11

the lighthouse with that bird

1:28:18

and it seems to physically hurt the metal fetishist as he's doing his rocket jump runs or whatever they are and he

1:28:24

just falls over in the street as if he's just been hit you know which confused me i actually thought that meant that maybe

1:28:31

this whole time he had been astral projecting himself you know like sending out his influence and his body was still

1:28:36

in the scrap yard and that maybe a homeless guy had just walked by and just beat him up

1:28:43

okay i actually that's that's absolutely not what happened but i really like that interpretation i mean

1:28:50

again i just i have all these false leads as i'm going through this you know we're just like well it could be oh no no

1:28:56

yeah either way the metal collector rots the corruption but i don't know

1:29:02

later on he's back so i don't know he briefly rots and then he unrots um

1:29:07

businessman from his last push from the metal collector he lands in a warehouse full of scraps and stuff and then the

1:29:13

metal collector returns and he's now more cybernetic there's more stuff stuck to him

1:29:19

i heard they used the insides of tv parts to stick to the two actors for this

1:29:24

i think that's more obvious with the metal physicist yeah so the fetishist

1:29:31

seems to stop motion move metal stuff by just making a fist in the air like he's magneto

1:29:38

and they do it a lot i think it's like 30 fist grabs or whatever you know it's just like throwing stuff around inside

1:29:44

the warehouse at the business man yeah i mean it makes sense if you have an

1:29:49

overpowered power one i keep using it yeah although his motives aren't exactly clear because i don't think he's killing

1:29:55

him he's just sort of burying him in metal as if to exacerbate his condition

1:30:00

i don't know maybe he wants him to suffer like rather than die yeah i do think that's kind of what he's going for i think yeah so the

1:30:08

businessman wakes up to find himself melded into a huge mass of metal in parts it's like a giant wall of stuff

1:30:14

now yeah but it's moving around it actually does look pretty cool they built a really bizarre

1:30:20

contraption to put him inside of yeah he thinks in this movie really far yeah i hope we're like i don't mean

1:30:28

i know we're i'm expressing a great deal of confusion about what it's about and what everyone's motives are but yeah

1:30:34

visually it actually looks pretty great the whole time yeah there's a lot of stop motion but it is interesting and jarring in the way

1:30:41

it's done so yeah i'm impressed it's weird because time seems to have

1:30:47

passed but then the camera goes and looks back to where the metal collector was standing and he's still standing

1:30:52

there he's just like yeah i've been here this whole time it's probably hours later he's trying to do the the fist squeeze

1:30:58

be like ah i'll do more things and then like it seems like his power has run out and then his hand falls off and just

1:31:05

becomes like a flamethrower gun of some sort yes yeah

1:31:11

i mean i'm not against the idea that's pretty cool uh it's cool it does feel like a bit of

1:31:16

a democrat yeah like yeah you know a gun is nice but it's it's nice to be able to hold other

1:31:22

things when you don't need a gun so metal collector says that

1:31:27

you know it's like the one time when they when he starts to begin to explain something and i really appreciate that

1:31:32

he bothered so he just says that his body was melded with parts that were originally rusty so

1:31:39

that sewed corruption into the transformation of his body as they were trying to assimilate with the metal

1:31:45

but the businessman however was originally infected by stainless steel shaving razor or at least they say

1:31:51

so like i guess he got metal in his cheek from shaving i guess

1:31:57

maybe which i think it implies that it's a more successful bond because it's an unrotted or

1:32:03

uncorroded metal and that maybe it's a purer assimilation maybe he's a better

1:32:08

specimen because of it so the metal collector rocket shoes

1:32:13

his way to businessman i guess to do like a finishing punch or cook him with a flamethrower arm yeah but the

1:32:19

businessman just entangles him in wires and and gunks up the the barrel of the gun

1:32:25

we will also see the return of the drill penis yeah

1:32:34

the metal collector guy says oh you can't you know i don't know you said you can't absorb me i'm rust you know if we

1:32:40

combine then you know i'll rot you and then we'll both die businessman doesn't seem to care

1:32:46

and then he just pulls out his he has his trusty drill penis and just impales metal collector with it

1:32:52

what a shameful way to be wounded by an enemy you know to have like a a weird drill penis come out be like

1:32:59

what wait what is this what really

1:33:04

it's not even a third arm man it's like that penis gun from uh from

1:33:10

dusk till dawn you know just like what is this you've got two different chambers for

1:33:16

each testicle this is considerably weird yeah i suppose so

1:33:23

so then there's a lot of strange undulating shapes that just kind of happen in a struggle it's hard to tell

1:33:29

which is which and honestly it doesn't really matter i think ultimately the metal collector

1:33:35

fetishist guy is losing and seems lessened and then he tries to leave but then the businessman

1:33:42

kind of grabs him and pulls him back oh no you don't you're coming in yeah so then they get kind of

1:33:48

combined i hate having like use this questioning tone for everything but this is the movie so you know it's just like

1:33:54

well then this happened so we cut to a weird upside down shot of

1:34:01

the businessman and the metal collector sharing some sort of i don't know a transcendental

1:34:07

abyss kind of floating around in space you know and they're kind of i don't know sharing

1:34:13

an understanding it reminded me a little bit of like 2001

1:34:19

you know we're just like oh like you just kind of float above the situation you know like in a moment of clarity

1:34:24

ah yeah we've combined we've made our peace with one another i mean uh

1:34:32

i attempted to murder you i don't think he ever died so the metal fetishist was just really hurt

1:34:38

and then yeah also to be clear this movie is exactly like 2001 in every

1:34:44

way yeah in quality scene by scene exactly

1:34:49

i mean we all remember the drill penis in 2001

1:34:54

okay so this is the last scene in the movie so of course it has to be as crazy if not

1:34:59

crazier than every other scene so out on the street we see that they have

1:35:05

indeed fused into some kind of a crazy mad max looking rocket motorcycle parade

1:35:12

float of twisted metal you know what that's a really good description of what that looks like

1:35:17

yeah one of them i don't know how i'd describe it one of them it's like you know when you're when you're pretending to be like a horse and one of you is the

1:35:23

butt end and the other one's the head i think the metal collector is the there's the top part and he's got like a

1:35:30

random uzi that he never had in the movie before but it's suddenly attached to his arm guy i've got a gun

1:35:36

and then the businessman i believe is the engine or the car of whatever they are

1:35:42

the rocket part yeah and so then they sort of make their peace with one another they're like hey together we can

1:35:48

make the whole world meddle you know and he's like yeah let's do it and then they just rock it out into the

1:35:54

street you know like it's like a weird happy ending where like i guess their feud is over and now the whole world is doomed

1:36:01

because of it uh yeah i i would specifically like to uh point out a bit of dialogue from the

1:36:08

uh the metal first our love can destroy this whole [ __ ] world

1:36:15

jesus i mean our love is unbreakable if you're gonna

1:36:21

end the movie i feel like i feel like that's like one of the best ways you can end the movie yeah

1:36:26

and i mean boom it's over at that point i mean like that's it

1:36:33

they have credits and it's like five names yep the two lead actors uh the

1:36:40

girlfriend lady the lady with the glasses and that homeless guy and that's it

1:36:45

i guess he didn't include the other people who helped and then left he was just like ah screw those people

1:36:52

no it's funny these are some of the shortest credits i've ever seen in a movie i just have to say i i feel

1:36:58

changed after this film jacob uh well you're probably i mean there was my life before tetsuo the iron man and

1:37:06

then there's my life after tetsuo the iron man well

1:37:11

you're you're in luck because you'd better believe

1:37:17

that we're going to be doing tetsuo tets bluetooth oh my god i don't know

1:37:23

we have to at least put some distance my god yeah no no no no no no

1:37:29

well it's that'll just be a looming threat but at any point i could choose tits well too yeah we

1:37:37

should amass uh revenge movies to unleash on one another out of spite no i don't get

1:37:44

no no to be clear this is the spy thing i do think i like this movie a lot i do think tetsuo

1:37:49

ii is collecting a better movie it's kind of interesting because i feel

1:37:54

like as the series goes on it's just kind of refining the concept yeah it

1:37:59

seems like it's um i've already forgotten his name sukamoto sort of refining himself each

1:38:06

time he does it yeah and i feel like bullet man is kind of like it's almost

1:38:12

too horrifying the words just kind of like a straight revenge story that doesn't have a whole lot going for

1:38:18

it let me aside from the bald man looking very cool okay

1:38:24

body hammer feels like like a a complete movie we're like all right it

1:38:31

kind of like it still has some of the indie elements from the first movie but it's it's just

1:38:36

like refined a little bit more without it just being too shaved down which i feel is the case

1:38:42

the bullet man yeah yeah i don't know if that makes any sense this movie jacob

1:38:48

has 79 on rotten tomatoes

1:38:53

how does it have such a high rate i i'm baffled by that um because

1:39:00

who else is going to be watching tetsuo but people who actively seek it out i've

1:39:06

heard that quentin tarantino and a bunch of other famous directors and stuff really like and took influence from this

1:39:12

film and from the director i mean i could see it yeah so i don't know maybe it's got a real culti following with uh aficionados

1:39:19

you know like real like inside folk yeah and you know how people love to believe that lord over

1:39:25

an obscure thing that you were able to find i i know i don't know if it's quite like

1:39:30

that but i do think that it's it's a case of who's accidentally going to

1:39:37

watch tetsuo yeah i feel like this would actually be a really good movie for

1:39:43

you know like at the uh at that cinema that was near our house or my house now i guess here in san

1:39:49

francisco but you know the cinema there's a lot of places like that now though where it's kind of like a hipstery cinema bar and they'll play

1:39:56

like a movie in the background while you're doing stuff you know they do this at other bars too come to think of it yeah okay i don't know if you

1:40:03

i do not think like tetsumo is a movie that you can have almost background yeah

1:40:09

if not for the sodomy scene like maybe if you just took that out no dude there's there's so much weird

1:40:15

stuff maybe it's demands your attention it's a shame because it's real close i mean if yeah it's too graphic i suppose

1:40:22

but just visually it's so striking like if you were just to see like a soundless part of this playing somewhere you'd be

1:40:27

like what the hell is that yeah which i i think that's something that the sequel

1:40:33

does better apparently they used clips from this movie to make a music video for portis

1:40:39

head which is a band from the 90s uh huh that's kind of interesting

1:40:46

so someone did i mean i guess someone was able to curate it into like the usable parts

1:40:53

i mean there are lots of usable parts it's just that there's like an equal amount of unuseful

1:40:59

yeah and it's only an hour long so i mean that's real divisive yeah

1:41:07

on a scale of one to ten by whatever metric you want we used to try to have metrics i've given up on

1:41:14

that just whatever you feel yeah no so whatever however you feel like doing it how would

1:41:19

you rate this film um god

1:41:25

okay here's the thing i feel like it's somewhere in the eight range

1:41:31

because and let me explain the director

1:41:36

like i don't feel like this is a failed vision i feel like the director set out to make exactly this movie

1:41:43

and he succeeded yeah i can't fault the execution

1:41:49

because this is exactly what he wanted yes hey i feel like yeah and there are other

1:41:54

positive qualities too i like it like i said i love the special effects i think the

1:42:00

music is fun yeah the music is pretty great yeah i mean like the acting too

1:42:06

granted they're only like four actors i don't think there are any real bad actors

1:42:11

the performance from for like the girlfriend it's pretty fun yeah i think maybe the director himself

1:42:17

might be the weakest performance but he's still pretty good yeah so i don't know i

1:42:24

i don't feel like it's fair to rate the movie too well

1:42:30

hmm so nine out of ten like i said eat range i could you know i

1:42:35

mean if we're talking about what he wanted to make

1:42:40

versus like what he he did make i mean on that metric it is 10 out of 10

1:42:46

because he clearly did just want to make this movie i don't know if he would even agree to that oh i think so i mean

1:42:53

granted he did kind of keep going back to like refine the concept but yeah

1:42:59

i do not get the impression that he considers this movie a failure in execution

1:43:05

all right anyway i feel like that's kept for something yeah i just keep going back to

1:43:11

like you know because i know at one point he literally was going to burn the negatives because of how unpleasant of

1:43:17

an experience it was for him just making it well sure but i i think that's more of

1:43:23

like the experience rather than like the result because i mean he obviously didn't release it yeah

1:43:30

yeah maybe it was better afterwards it wasn't a success by the way in japan it was a success when he brought it to an

1:43:37

italian film festival where it won the first place at some festival and then people were you know it was

1:43:43

like word of mouth where everyone's just like oh you gotta see this crazy japanese movie you know spread across the world that way

1:43:51

yeah and then he was he was able to get more money and then he was able to make the sequels probably

1:43:56

in a less unpleasant way yeah well i mean that's funny you mentioned that because we did make the

1:44:02

uh jello comparison yeah i'm sure they would have loved it yeah

1:44:11

all right so what do you give it jacob i mean like i said i'm going from there

1:44:16

oh eight really oh i didn't hear i'm sorry oh geez no i

1:44:21

yeah wow well you know on um wait what is on imdb it's got seven out of ten so

1:44:27

apparently you're not alone let's see yeah i have to search my own

1:44:33

feelings for this it's complicated for me yeah that's the thing

1:44:38

it's not a for sure i mean if you ask me this at a later date i don't even know if i'd give that

1:44:43

but i i don't know it's like a very specific tool to me you know like where it would be very useful

1:44:50

to certain people at certain times but almost useless to everyone else [Laughter]

1:44:58

yeah like a kitchen appliance that's made for just peeling one thing and if you don't like that thing you're just

1:45:03

like i would never use this yeah i mean it's not quite that limited but i

1:45:09

mean you know what i'm saying is like it's only going to be palatable to certain people for certain reasons

1:45:15

yeah yeah so it's creative it's it's unique it's it's

1:45:21

almost unbearable in its grinding relentlessness at times

1:45:27

it goes on for far too long in some places i feel actually i would have cut out i

1:45:32

don't know maybe 10 minutes or more there's a lot of wasted time especially at the beginning where like stuff doesn't really happen

1:45:40

it's a hard watch if you run it continuously from start to finish i would recommend if someone's going to watch this

1:45:46

you should like take a few breaks take a breather every now and then it makes it easier

1:45:51

uh so i know i'm going to give it

1:45:56

i'm going gonna give it a four out of ten yeah damn all right which is to say it's

1:46:02

unpleasant to watch but i admire what's done in it

1:46:08

yeah because i can see like certain things for me for certain things like

1:46:13

five out of ten is sort of average six is like good or cult favorite and then like

1:46:19

seven is more cult favorite and then eight is genuinely good and the nine and ten is like really good or you know or

1:46:25

borderline perfect yeah so for fringy experimental films for me that's always on the lower end

1:46:30

unless it's really transcendental somehow or transcendent is the word you know where it really rises above

1:46:37

and i don't know maybe i'm just too hard on it for not being palatable enough to

1:46:44

no that's that's completely i also i guess maybe i don't respond well

1:46:49

to the random sodomy scenes you know and the pointlessness of certain plot

1:46:56

threads and that kind of a thing i mean okay first of all there's really only

1:47:01

the ones on the scene just the one yeah but

1:47:06

just saying well i know we'll we'll have to deal with those things as they happen you know it's a

1:47:12

i'm not saying that it's not like a part of cinema or whatever but yeah it's i don't know i'm never gonna be super

1:47:17

happy with it at least it's an unconventional situation

1:47:22

i mean yeah to be fair when i i suggested this i had not seen this movie

1:47:29

since yeah i guess i guess i was like 13. and i was like yeah you know

1:47:34

yeah no i saw like a bunch of stuff as a kid i like probably shouldn't have seen

1:47:40

oh and like anything that bears bringing up by the way so for everyone who's listening

1:47:46

jacob was originally gonna have us watch wicked city the the anime and he's like oh listen yeah we can't do this i mean

1:47:53

this is too there's a lot of non-consensual stuff happening we should you should do

1:47:58

something else no else and then he chose this one no okay look granted a guy does get

1:48:06

a pipe up the bum in a dream we could see it is a little bit different because it's well yeah because it's it's more

1:48:12

worried and it's like it feels like you're it's like

1:48:18

catering to an audience of degenerates yeah i am not an exploitation fan i guess that's also part of why maybe i

1:48:25

rate this movie a little lower because i i don't really revel in the in the real filthy grossness despite the

1:48:32

fact that i call our podcast gorman and gore i'm more of like i don't know i guess i'm a little more mainstreamy

1:48:38

where like you know i like things with a certain amount of polish and a certain amount of appeal like a wider broader

1:48:44

scope i guess yeah which i guess is kind of funny because i feel like the

1:48:49

grimy kind of like indie nature of this movie is exactly what i like about it well okay for that kind of movie it is

1:48:56

quite excellent because it doesn't revel in the bad parts a lot of exploitation

1:49:02

as you were saying before with like wicked city they're taking a gross joy in like a bad thing and that's

1:49:09

clearly not the intent of this movie this is like an uncomfortable memory well not a memory a dream something that

1:49:16

he doesn't want to have happen it's tastefully done for what it is

1:49:22

sort of yeah yeah i mean yeah there's just like that little bit of difference but makes it more okay

1:49:29

it is a better yeah it's a it's a good line that they didn't well i don't know i was about to say it

1:49:34

didn't cross well you do have to watch the tube going for way too long way too long

1:49:42

yeah yeah anyway uh

1:49:47

peter we need to we need to stop the one on that yeah i know i thought i'm debating like yeah maybe i'll just

1:49:53

cut out this part of the conversation like you know no one needs to hear you you you promised and then you

1:50:00

brought it back i know i mean you know it was important to my reading you know like it flavored it i guess so

1:50:07

i sort of had to i guess i don't know hey yeah yeah okay so

1:50:12

moving on let's do the top 20 imdb keywords for tetsuo the iron man

1:50:20

all right there's 130 that were in there so i mean it was quite a selection

1:50:26

i think you'll like some of these ones especially the very first one all right all right so number one

1:50:32

giant metal phallus

1:50:40

how many other movies to say they've been applying to yeah i mean there can't be that many

1:50:45

no and also i almost wish i had read these before i saw the movie just to sort of be prepared

1:50:52

like oh it's that kind of a movie all right then yeah two uh very little dialogue

1:51:01

also true yeah i guess yeah

1:51:06

yeah there's maybe a paragraph of dialogue there's just yeah a few sentences interspersed throughout the

1:51:11

movie yeah let's see number three experimental film

1:51:18

yeah yeah yeah number four stop motion scene

1:51:24

it should say scenes there's a whole bunch yeah yeah that's one two three four five so number

1:51:31

five body horror yeah uh yeah oh yeah i guess this is also kind of the

1:51:38

first body horror movie no we did the fly and the fly too oh yeah you know you're right but yeah

1:51:44

it's it's right up there with the fly in terms of body horror it's a a strong

1:51:49

competitor yeah i'd say so six rust uh yeah

1:51:56

seven metamorphosis yeah i guess i kind of wish it was a slightly faster metamorphosis that was

1:52:03

part of the thing like i thought it dragged a little bit at the beginning you know like that part with the the businessman just writhing around in a in

1:52:10

a stairwell you know before you know what's happening it's like you know we could have just done without that part

1:52:17

eight metal uh yeah pretty important yeah

1:52:23

nine japanese also pretty important

1:52:29

i mean i don't know if it's important than news yeah ten fetishist

1:52:35

i mean i guess uh yeah i mean sure

1:52:41

eleven transformation well it's the same as metamorphosis really

1:52:47

hey yeah okay that's a bit of a waste slot yep 12

1:52:53

mutilation uh boy yeah yeah i mean it starts with

1:53:00

it yeah uh 13

1:53:05

one word title that's actually how i learned that tetsuo probably been iron man when i was looking through this

1:53:14

sure that can count 14 written by director

1:53:20

yeah i mean i guess 15 based on short film yeah i think that's the uh

1:53:27

phantom of average size i think was sort of a precursor to this film

1:53:32

okay i gotta rewatch some of this old stuff because i'm sure some of it's

1:53:38

entering you dude yeah i'm sure it all is um you can actually also get a uh

1:53:45

there's a dvd collection that has all of them together it was released sometime in the 2000s so i bet you could dig it

1:53:51

up somewhere hey all right guess what i'm watching after this

1:53:57

what phantom of regular size oh okay yeah it's only 18 minutes

1:54:04

yeah oh yeah wow this is totally just huh all right yeah well i mean i think he

1:54:10

was encouraged from those shorter films you know he's like you should do something serious he's like okay i'm

1:54:16

gonna dedicate a year and a half and non-stop film something that's gonna drive everyone crazy

1:54:26

all right 16 japanese shocker that's actually a good way to describe

1:54:31

this game yeah i think yeah yeah i like that

1:54:36

17 japan yeah kind of a lost slot there

1:54:43

18 surrealism sure yeah pretty surreal

1:54:49

that counts yeah 19. human magnetism

1:54:56

that's that's so specific it's very specific yeah this has got to be like the only movie oh no wait ernest goes to jail no

1:55:05

peter peter literally the x-men movies like all of them oh well yeah i mean i

1:55:12

guess magneto feels like cheating but yeah

1:55:18

yeah and uh number 20 gore

1:55:25

yeah yeah hey i mean they're not they're not wrong not as much as you'd think but it's uh

1:55:33

you know when it's there it's pretty profound so yeah yeah it's

1:55:38

i wouldn't even say it's that gory but there's something about the effects and like the way it shot

1:55:44

there's a lot of tubes going down throats and stuff you know so it just feels like gore

1:55:49

yeah yeah you see a lot of stuff coming through shirts but you don't actually see it it's just implied with the

1:55:55

horrible gurgling noises it just feels like even though it's not

1:56:01

yeah i i would say that's more true the movie feels way gorier than it actually

1:56:06

is yeah if anyone's interested not only is

1:56:12

phantom of regular size on youtube but also this film you could just go watch it right now

1:56:18

you could skip right over the sodomy part yeah i mean i said i was gonna watch it

1:56:23

but i don't actually know the legality of any of that so like maybe um maybe i'm joking maybe i'm joking and for

1:56:29

legal purposes i'm not watching that yeah yeah i don't know

1:56:35

whatever yeah i don't know so you have any partying lessons from tetsuo jacob

1:56:43

always make sure that the metal that you're sticking inside your body is clean and not breasted yeah that is

1:56:49

words to live by what about you peter i would advise that when you run over

1:56:54

someone you make damn sure they're dead yeah rules what did they do with that

1:56:59

guy they left him in the forest and then he was he just crawled

1:57:04

to the junkyard like by himself how did he get there yeah

1:57:10

through willpower yeah just share will i guess

1:57:16

yeah i don't know what else to tell you he's just like in a rancid puddle of

1:57:22

water and he's just heals up on his own uh i guess yeah through the power of

1:57:29

hate and revenge i guess yeah and also but metal yeah maybe he already had powers and that had

1:57:35

something to do with it yeah well so i just maybe we can

1:57:40

speculate further on a future episode in which we will review tetsumo to bonnie oh stop saying

1:57:48

that right and a promise [Laughter]

1:57:56

jacob does not speak for this podcast well we'll see yeah i mean first of all trans stop me yeah i've you know i've

1:58:02

already promised we will watch every horror film that's ever been made but you know it's more about the order in which it happens

1:58:09

yeah so yeah i just want to thank everybody who somehow made it to this point in the podcast

1:58:15

if you listen to all of this i mean just hats off you know what i mean kudos

1:58:21

we love you guys yeah so good job yeah i mean yes congratulations

1:58:26

golf club congratulations congratulations shinji

1:58:33

so until next time i've been peter i and i'm still jacob

1:58:39

and this is gorman on gore later

1:59:00

uh ah

1:59:06

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